Be afraid, Be very afraid!
by Firefox3
Summary: It's funny at least I think it is. Who is this mysterious man and WHAT IS HIEI WEARING? HxK all the way!


"COME ON, BABY, COME ON!!"  
  
Botan hovered outside the curtained window wondering if she should go in.  
  
"GIVE IT TO ME!"  
  
No matter how it sounded, this was an important mission.  
  
*Tap, tap*  
  
. *Tap, tap*  
  
.  
  
Finally she decided to just go in and saw.  
  
"YES, I LANDED ON BOARDWALK!"  
  
"YOU WERE PLAYING MONOPOLY?"  
  
"Yeah, what did you think we were doing? Having sex?"  
  
Botan blushes then remembers why she's there.  
  
"Koenma has another mission for you."  
  
"Don't tell me we've got to clean his room again."  
  
"No, this time it's really important!"  
  
"Yeah, right."  
  
"Are you saying I'm a liar," Botan asks, holding her oar menacingly.  
  
"Nope, let's go!"  
  
"But I was so close to beating you!"  
  
"In your dreams Keiko, I landed on boardwalk!"  
  
"Yeah, you landed there but you can't afford it."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"You only have two bucks!"  
  
"So?"  
  
"ARGH, take him away!"  
  
And so it stars, the weirdest mission Yusuke will ever have.  
  
{^_~}{$_$}{&_&}{X_X}{H_H}{0_0}{()_()}{_}{^_^}{@-@}{*_*}{#_#}{^_*}  
  
Yusuke arrive at Koenma's office green and very likely of puking.  
  
"If you throw up on my desk I'll send you back to the land of the dead!"  
  
He looked a lot better after that.  
  
"Now boy's, you have a new mission."  
  
"And we don't have any information, but we trust you will get the job done. Actually we don't but you're our only hope," Yusuke adds in sarcastically.  
  
"Actually I was going to say we have tons of information on this guy. we just can't find it at the moment. You've still got to do your best though."  
  
So, after sending death glares off the wazoo, the boys reluctantly go...  
  
*SPLAT *  
  
.And fall face first into a humungous mud pile, at least that's what they hope it is.  
  
"AHEM," *flip, flip* "Here we are, ahem. I AM THE ALMIGHTY INSERT NAME HERE! TREMBLE, TREMBLE BEFORE MY POWER!" *flip, flip* "IF YOU ARE TRYING TO STOP ME YOU WILL FAIL BECAUSE I AM THE ALMIGHTY, THE ONE, THE ONLY, INSERT NAME HERE. THERE ARE NO OTHERS AS GREAT AS I, BIG FREAKIN IDIOT!" . "ALRIGHT, WHO WROTE IN MY BOOK?"  
  
The boys all stare at what they decide is either insert name here or big freakin idiot.  
  
"WHO WROTE IN MY BOOK? IF YOU'RE HERE SHOW YOURSELF!"  
  
.  
  
"YOU, COWARD, ARE DEFINETLY AFRAID OF." *flip, flip* "THE POWERFUL POOPER SCOOPER!" . " WHO'S DOING IT? WHEN THE COWARD DOING THIS SHOWS THEM SELF I WILL . I WILL . GET THEM AND THEIR LITTLE DOG TOO," says the person, who the boys have decided fits the name big freakin idiot best, in a fit of totally original evilness.  
  
"Who the hell are you and what are you talking to?"  
  
*flip, flip* "I AM THE AW INSPIRING PIECE OF SHIT!"  
  
Yusuke is looking at the freak wondering why he left the monopoly game he knew he was gonna win for this. Kuwabara was looking at him and somehow thinking of Yukina, even though this guy was butt ugly he reminded him of her. Kurama was deciding this guy had better start reading better books. And Hiei was smirking, he finally found someone shorter than him.  
  
Indeed the guy was short, and ugly, infact he looked like a foot tall Kuwabara, only uglier. (shudder)  
  
The boys got up to find they were somehow in a castle, even if it did look like a pigsty. Another thing they noticed is how they landed, Yusuke had landed on Kuwabara back and Hiei had landed on Kurama's front, Yusuke quickly moved, same with Hiei, but he moved more reluctantly.  
  
"What happened to this place?" asks Kurama, picking up some discarded underwear realizing what it is and throwing it as far away from him as he can.  
  
"ARE YOU SCARED OF MY AMAZING POWER?"  
  
"Hn!"  
  
"WHAT DID THAT MEAN? IF YOU'RE TRYING TO HIDE SOMETHING FROM ME YOU WILL REGRET IT!"  
  
"He said 'Why would we be afraid of you? And stop talking in those damn caps!' that's all," explained Kurama like it was perfectly normal to actually understand what Hiei says.  
  
"OH IS THAT ALL WELL THAT ISN'T THAT BAD. WAIT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'WHY WOULD WE BE AFRAID OF YOU?' NO ONE INSULTS ME FEEL MY WRATH!"  
  
With this the mysterious guy who has yet to give us a name called upon his spirit energy, witch is scarier than they thought I'd be, and did a horrifying thing. The whole room glowed bright pink and Britney Spears music stared playing (the horror!) and then it happened, he did the unthinkable, he made Hiei wear PINK!  
  
Hiei looked thoroughly disgusted then decided to kill this perverted freak, but of course he missed because this is the bad guy and the first hit never actually hurts him. Now the mysterious guy who hasn't given us his name, tmgwhguhn for short, didn't feel it was right to try and fight Hiei, why? Because Hiei looked freakin' tall to this guy! So he called upon his minion.  
  
"MINION!" (original ain't he?)  
  
Hearing his master calling the most disturbing creature came out of the deepest darkest corner, that was just there somehow. This minion was ugly! It was purple, it was green, it was BARNEY! (AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!)  
  
"I love you, you love me."  
  
The boys had never faced something this horrible, they knew they were done for when. An angel appeared! Okay so it wasn't an angel it was something even better, it was a pissed off female demon! Barney's everywhere watch out, no one can stand up to the ferocity of a pissed off female demon.  
  
"I love."  
  
"DIE, YOU PURPLE FREAK, DIE!"  
  
"ARRRRGGGGHHHHHH! YOU LITTLE BITCH!"  
  
And with that Barney died a horrible and deserved death. The not so pissed off female demon left, after glomping Hiei. I mean who can resist?  
  
Now tmgwhguhn was mad and so he took it out on Hiei. (NOOOOOOOOOOOO *muse knocks author out cause she's gettin' on his nerves*) Tmgwhguhn somehow managed to seriously harm Hiei even though he's smaller, weaker and definitely not as cool. Kurama cried out in rage and chopped the guy into pieces before he could sprout some more pathetic villain lines then ran to Hiei and started, well you'll see.  
  
"HIEI, WHY YOU? I LOVE YOU AND I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE DYING AND CAN'T HEAR ME! I LOVE YOU EVEN THOUGH YOU ACT AS IF I DON'T EXSIST. THIS IS PROBABLY A PATHETIC TIME TO TELL YOU BUT I DON'T CARE BECAUSE WHEN YOU DIE I INSTANTLY HAVE TO LOSE MY SANITY!"  
  
"Kurama, you actually care? I didn't think you felt the same way. I can't believe it took my death for us to realize it but. arn't I dead yet? I mean I never really planned what to say after that. Oh, I got it! Hn!"  
  
"Hiei, that's the sweetest thing I've ever heard."  
  
Yusuke and Kuwabara just stand in the sidelines deciding it's best to be in the background then actually take a part in this disturbing love scene.  
  
"Hn."  
  
"Yeah, we would have had great kids what do you think they're names would have been?"  
  
Kurama and Hiei seemed completely oblivious to the fact that two guys don't equal kids. They also seem to have forgotten that Hiei is dying and that Kurama is supposed to overreact and be completely insane. But none of that matters because this author would rather French kiss Kuwabara than let Hiei die.  
  
So Hiei is miraculously healed and they all go their separate ways. Yusuke went back and lost the game of monopoly. Kuwabara went to see Yukina because. well if you don't know why you don't know much about YYH. We don't know what has befallen Hiei and Kurama, the disappeared together soon after they got back to the human world.  
  
And they lived happily ever after, that is until the next mission or the next crazed fan girl decides they want to mess with their lives, so really they lived happily until 5 seconds later.  
  
{^_~}{$_$}{&_&}{X_X}{H_H}{0_0}{()_()}{_}{^_^}{@-@}{*_*}{#_#}{^_*}  
  
Well that's the end of that, or is it? Hmmmm. Well anyway please R+R. Oh yeah, Flameofmydesire disclaimer please.  
  
"If Firefox owned the YYH gang she would have actually seen the whole series wouldn't she?"  
  
WAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! You didn't have to remind me!  
  
"Stop being a cry baby and end the fic!"  
  
JA NE ^_~  
  
"*sigh* Mood swings." 


End file.
